Conversations With Mum

  • Grand Prix

    [tweetmeme source=”nettiewriter” http://www.URL.com] Mum was watching the Abu Dhabi grand prix today. Mum: ‘Is that coming from Abba Dabba?’ George: ‘Abu Dhabi, mum.’ Mum: ‘Where is Abba Dabba? Is it in India cos I saw a few folk wearing they dresses.’ Claire: ‘UAE.’ Mum: ‘Eh?’ George: ‘An Arab country, mum.’ Mum: ‘They’re Arabs?’ George: ‘Yes,…

  • £29.87

    [tweetmeme source=”nettiewriter” http://www.URL.com] At Tesco today: Cashier: ‘That’s £29.87, please.’ Mum: ‘£39.27?’ Cashier: ‘No, £29.87.’ Mum: ‘£27.99?’ Cashier: ‘Do you have your own bags?’ Mum: ‘I’m very well, thanks.’ Me: ‘I need booze.’ [tweetmeme source=”nettiewriter” http://www.URL.com]

  • This cow is small, those ones outside are faraway….

    [tweetmeme source=”nettiewriter” http://www.URL.com] Today was one of those days when my mum was comedy gold. I had to go into town to return a pair of trousers my daughter bought in Sainsbury’s so I thought we’d take mum with us for a few hours out of the house. We live in a small village about…

  • Simples!

    [tweetmeme source=”nettiewriter” http://www.URL.com] A few days ago I was showing my mum some of the pictures I took on our holiday to York in August. We got to the many, many pictures I took of meerkats at the wildlife park. “Oh, look! That’s they wee things from the TV adverts. Annette, where do they come…

  • Ah, Tripoli…

    Mum and I are sitting watching the news from Libya. Mum: Tripoli? I thought that was in America. Me: No, Mum. That’s in Libya. Mum: There was an American film made about it – The Shores of Tripoli. Me: Never heard of it, but America does make films about different places. Mum: But it was…

  • Tea Cup Dog

    Mum and I were in the newsagents where a cute Jack Russell jumped up at us, tail wagging happily. We paid for our paper and left the shop. Me: Mum, that was a friendly wee dog, wasn’t it? Mum: You want a cup of tea? Me: No, I’m talking about the dog. Mum: Oh, I…

  • Answering the Phone

    We came from holiday to find mum had unplugged the router, lamp and Hifi. Me: Why did you unplug everything, Mum? Mum: The phone was ringing and I couldn’t find it. There was a noise coming from in here too (we have cordless phones & a traditional one) so I unplugged stuff till it stopped. Me: That…

  • Bargain

    I took my mum to TKMaxx Mum: Annette, Annette, look at this! It’s only £6! Me: What is it? Mum: Dunno, but it’s only £6!

  • Email

    The phone rings: Mum: I sent you an email. Me: Mum, you don’t have a computer. Mum: No, on the phone. Me: Ah, you left a phone message? Mum: That’s what I said.

  • Ossama is Dead

    I came home to a phone message from my mum. “Hello, it’s me. Mum. Just phoning you to let you know Ossama Bin Laden is dead, but everything is alright here.” The world will breathe easier for that, Mum.